Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish

Sheryl is a relatively new friend of mine, stitched into my life through pickleball and our mutually questionable Japanese. Her approach to ageing, strong and sharp and joyfully defiant, always inspires me. I am thrilled to share her voice today.

Age positivity has given me a new outlook. I used to think I was getting old. Now, because of a new mindset, I feel much younger than I did in my 40s, and I’m proud to say I’ll be turning 55 years young this November. Like the healthy nonagenarians, centenarians, and even super centenarians profiled more and more these days (social media, the CBC, etc.), my Modus Operandi is also to stay strong, fit, and sharp well into my silver years—silver being a nod to my new silver mane. 

This broad will not give into entropy. Not without a fight, at least. 

That's why pickleball is a fairly recent obsession of mine, and is how Beverly and I met. 

Research concludes that pickleball can add up to 6-10 years to someone’s life. The physical benefits are undeniable, and my legs are a testament to this. An avid cyclist, my thighs have always been strong, but with pickleball, they are now as thick as tree trunks. 

That said, for this post, I’d like to focus more on a mental game one can play, both on and off the courts. While simple enough, it’s seldom highlighted, so I’d like to champion it here. To help keep your mind sharp, which is something I’m sensitive to since I lost my mom to dementia, each time you meet a new player/person, make a deliberate effort to remember their name. 

For context, when I was younger, I was not as wise. I'd often eschew peoples’ names. At large gatherings, I’d call someone Buddy or Bud, in lieu of their real name. This pattern continued in a similar vein when I taught English overseas. In the early 90s, it was socially acceptable to give Japanese students American names. School directors felt this cultivated a North American setting. Teachers happily acquiesced. Why wouldn’t we? We no longer had to learn our students’ real names, which were foreign and super awkward to pronounce. In hindsight, it was an obvious crutch, which just robbed us of a full and immersive cultural experience, which is what travel should be all about.

Over the decades, I have come to realize that crutches deprive our bodies of what they inherently want to do: to move and stay sharp. That's why I still choose to bike instead of drive, use manual devices instead of electric ones, type instead of dictate stuff to Siri, take the stairs, read books, lift weights, etc. Like a bank account that compounds money over time, I believe that each little micro movement I do will translate into a richer, healthier life.

These days, I embrace remembering names. And the harder, the better! Not only does it show respect and that you care, it can also keep the neural connections in your brain strong. More importantly, it can sometimes foster fun—if you choose to play. 

Challenge accepted? If yes, here are some quick tips to remembering names:

Labels
A visual learner, I appreciate players who label their paddles. When someone first tells me their name, I can easily forget it. If I see their name printed somewhere, however, like the label itself, their name tends to stick. 

Spell It Out
In addition to being a visual learner, I’m also a kinaesthetic student, in that I need to act it out. That’s why I’ll sometimes spell out someone’s name on my paddle, which actually looks like a mini blackboard. It’s plain, black, and has some grit to it. To confirm I have someone’s name right, I use my index finger and spell their name on my paddle: “Yunkyu? Like this: Y-U-N-K-Y-U?” To lock it in even more, I'll add names to my Contacts and Pickleball Players list. 

Storytime
I love it when someone can tell me a story about their name. Most people, however, might not volunteer this information. So ask. You’d be surprised what you may learn. 

In this example, Subir, a hale and hearty gentleman in his nineties I'm fortunate enough to play pickleball with occasionally, told me his Indian name means a Brave Warrior. Considering Subir is still hitting the courts 3 times a week at 94 years young, his parents were certainly prescient when naming him, right?

Repeat It
“Say My Name, Say My Name.” 
Beyoncé definitely knows a thing or two so take a page from her massive hit song and repeat peoples’ names. Often. The more you say it, the likelier you are to remember it. 

Anuj, Harsheen, Rinat are just some of the names in regular rotation for me these days. These players are all supportive, encouraging, challenging, and keep me hungry: for more games, more growth, and more wins, which is something centenarians often credit for continued health and well being.

Mnemonics
Mnemonics never fail. Last week, when I asked my partner what their name was before we started to play (per Beverly’s suggestion in Pickleball Etiquette), this dark skinned, strong and stout, sixty-ish aged women told me, in a deadpan kind of way, that her name was Sharon. As in Sharon Stone. After doing a double take and seeing the twinkle in her eyes, I understood that Sharon was inviting me to play. Without missing a beat, I told her that I was relieved to be playing with someone with Basic Instincts. She got a kick out of that so asked me what my name was. I tried to match her wit so told her my name was Sheryl. As in Sheryl Crow. 

“All I wanna do is have some fun,” I said. 
Google Sheryl Crow & Sharon Stone if you didn’t grow up in the 90s like us.

Our game was super close, but we eventually lost 9-11. The giggles and fun banter we shared, however, were the far better, more salient points. 

Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish. 
Twenty years later, Steve Jobs’ famous quote still resonates. And to think it can all start with the simplest of questions, as in:

What’s your name?

Sheryl Gordon

Sheryl resides in Toronto. Her goal is to become super proficient at pickleball by the year 2030.